The Trademark Massachusetts Driving Move
Monday, May 28th 2007 @ 1:35 PM (not yet rated)
I have been a Massachusetts resident for over 12 years now. But we Sudbury residents are not the "typical" Massachusetts resident for two reasons: 1) we don't have the accent and 2) most of us refuse to adopt the increasingly popular driving technique known as the, "if I want to take a left then I will pull out in the middle of the road while inconveniencing dozens, perhaps hundreds of others, until the lane I am pulling into opens up" technique. Let me illustrate...
The red car holds the practitioner of this technique. As you can see, this driver is blocking the traffic so numerous drivers are forced to stop. The schedules of all these drivers and passengers are delayed because of the impatience of one driver.
Practitioners of this technique have argued that it is a necessary move, especially in Massachusetts, where most Dunkin Donuts somehow tend to be on side of the road that requires drivers to take a left out of the parking lot. Even I have waited a very long time to take a left hoping to see that magical break in the traffic, only to be honked at by the driver behind me for not exercising my state given right to perform this infamous move. As tempted as I was, I could not bring myself to do it.
In doing some research, I have found that Massachusetts drivers are not alone with this technique. It is also practiced in London, England, where the technique has a slightly different name... the "if I want to take a left then I will pull out in the middle of the road whilst inconveniencing dozens, perhaps hundreds of others, until the lane I am pulling into opens up" technique. Coincidently, people from London also have a funny accent.
Will we all soon be forced to perform this move? Will waiting a bit longer for a break in traffic take over as the default behavior of drivers? Do we just give up and take a right, then pull a u-ee somewhere down the road? Unclear the future is. Clouded by the dark side it has become. Your comments and suggestions welcome.
My Photo in the Sudbury Paper (online article)
Thursday, May 24th 2007 @ 5:21 AM (not yet rated)
Bo's gut... trick photography or real? Well, this one is a slight exaggeration of the real photo, but close enough. The photographer took at LEAST 50 photos and this is the one they chose. To set the record straight, I have a 35 inch waist (36 after dinner) and I do not wear my pants pulled up to my chest. When I look down, I COULD still see my toes. So what happened? Here are my current theories:
1) The photographer didn't like me
2) As the photo was being taken, i got bit by something on my lower back and arched, thus pushing out my gut
3) a gust of wind swept in from the windowless room, pushing out my baggy shirt
4) the camera adds 10 pounds -- to your gut
5) I really am that fat -- I have a skewed self-image and am living in denial
6) Anyone see "Junior" starring Arnold Schwartzenegger?
What ever the case, I am grateful that the article was posted. It was very well written.
